Friday, 28 October 2016

Top 20 HORROR MOVIES for Halloween


It's nearly Halloween, so I thought I'd compile a list of my 20 favourite Horror Movies of all time. I love every single one of these movies more than you could possibly imagine, despite almost all of them being panned by critics. I've kept the list to one movie per franchise to avoid Friday 13th  dominating it. I'm sure that my top 20 will prompt outrage from geeks across the world, especially due to the omission of several revered classics but I really don't care. I'm going to sit here and contemplate the sheer awesomeness of Jason X while devouring pizza. Oh, and I've included a few of my favourite scenes and trailers too. Enjoy!

20. NIGHT OF THE DEMONS (2009)


Sometimes remakes are great! There, I've said it! Night of the Demons is about a group of teenagers who end up at a Halloween party...and there're demons and stuff. That's all you need to know.  




19. GHOULIES II (1988)



I wasn't massive on the original movie, and the less said about 3 and 4 the better. However Ghoulies II is incredible. It was blatantly bankrolled after the success of Gremlins and Critters, and features the miniature monsters from Hell causing chaos at a funfair. The movie even has W.A.S.P on the soundtrack. What more could you want?







18. FINAL DESTINATION 2 (2003)


Final Destination was an awesome concept for a movie, and the franchise is one that can go on indefinitely. I love all of these movies, but the second is my favourite. I saw it in the cinema and the 'log scene' blew my mind. Every time I see a lorry carrying logs or pipes on the motorway, I'm in a different lane and looking to get past that fucker as quickly as possible. All thanks to this movie!

 





17. SAW (2004)


This film totally blew me away. It's a fantastic concept and I'm a huge fan of the franchise. OK, a couple of the later movies weren't exactly mind blowing, and the obligatory plot twists felt a bit contrived, but generally Saw films are solid. The original is still the best. If for some odd reason you have never seen it, I highly recommend that you do, and don't do any research on it as you'll almost certainly find spoilers. Trust me on this.





16. EVIL DEAD (1981)


Sam Raimi's horror masterpiece. The original Evil Dead is innovative, timeless, and really fucked up.





15. WOLFCOP (2014)


This film was an instant classic. No prizes for guessing that it's about a police officer who becomes a werewolf. Whoever came up with this deserves every award imaginable. It's fast paced and relentlessly funny, and the werewolf jail cell sex scene will disturb you for the rest of your natural life. Utter genius.





14. THE PURGE: ANARCHY (2014)


The second movie in the franchise. If you're unfamiliar with The Purge, it's set in a dystopian near future where all crime is legal for twelve hours once a year. The original movie was really good, but was more of a thriller. The sequel is more of a horror and takes the concept to the next level. 






13. HELLRAISER III: HELL ON EARTH (1992)


I'm sure that Hellraiser fans across the world would be horrified to find out that I prefer the third movie to the first two. Yes, the first two are more in keeping with the spirit of Hellraiser etc, or whatever the experts say. I really don't care. As far as I'm concerned, Hellraiser III is the shit. It's gloriously 90's, and has one of those imaginary rock clubs that makes every young kid want to be a night club owner when they grow up. It even has Armored Saint playing in it! Anyway, back to the movie. It has some of the best scenes and lines in the Hellraiser franchise. Remember the nightclub massacre? Wow! "Did you enjoy the girl?...so did I". Another fantastic scene. The icing on the cake is that phenomenal scene with Pinhead in the Church. Iconic and truly wonderful. Remember kids, don't listen to wankers. Hellraiser III is the way!


 


12. AN AMERICAN WEREWOLF IN LONDON (1981)


Easily the best Werewolf movie ever made, and John Landis' masterpiece. It has a very dark British sense of humour running throughout, and it utterly savage in the right places. The effects are way ahead of their time and are absolutely incredible. This is the film that lead to John Landis making Michael Jackson's Thriller. If this movie was good enough for MJ, it's good enough for my top 20!






11. LET THE RIGHT ONE IN (2008)


One of the darker and more serious movies on this list. Let The Right One In is a beautifully made, thoughtful movie about a young lonely boy who becomes friends with a girl who happens to be a vampire. Is she even a girl at all? It's a very clever movie addressing bullying and young romance. The depth shown by the young actors is astounding. It is a Swedish language movie and has English subtitles. Shortly after its release, Hollywood made an Americanised version of the movie called 'Let Me In'. It's good, but lacks a lot of the character of the original. The cast are all very perfect looking too, whereas in the original the vampire has more of an androgynous look, in keeping with the character from the book. I hate it when Hollywood remake fantastic movies for no other reason than to appeal to the lowest common denominator who refuse to watch anything with subtitles. The beauty of this story would probably be lost on those ignorant fuckheads anyway. If you have more than two brain cells, I highly recommend the original. 



10. BRIDE OF CHUCKY (1998)


After three Child's Play movies, Chucky returns in what I believe to be his ultimate film. It's sick, violent, and unbelievably funny. This is the first to feature the living legend that is Jennifer Tilly as Tiffany, Chucky's other half. It's a very self aware movie, and unlike its predecessors which I felt dragged a little, is a fast paced non-stop piece of awesomeness from start to finish. It also boasts some of the franchises finest and most elaborate death scenes. "Rude fucking doll!"






9. FROM DUSK TILL DAWN (1996)


My favourite Tarantino film (well he wrote it and Robert Rodriguez directed it). It starts off like a violent gangster movie following the escape of wanted bank robbers the Gecko brothers, and turns into a ludicrous vampire movie half way through. It works because the script and the dialogue is so good, and the actors are absolutely brilliant, most notably George Clooney who is utterly badass throughout. This movie also immortalised Salma Hayek as the hottest woman on the planet. 




8. CABIN FEVER (2002)


This is Eli Roth's finest moment. Cabin Fever is a black comedy / Horror about a group of teens who stay in a cabin in the woods (never heard that one before). A guy turns up at the cabin who is sick with a flesh eating virus. Naturally, the infection gets passed on and different characters get the virus along the way and so forth. However, the real charm with this movie is the dialogue and surreal characters. It's all about The Party Man, Pancakes and Doctor Mambo! Completely insane and utterly brilliant!






7. FRIGHT NIGHT (1985)


The story of a boy who finds out that a vampire has moved in next door and no-one believes him. The remake was good too, but the original has a simpler storyline and killer 80's soundtrack to boot so it wins hands down. 




6. CRITTERS (1986)


A movie about little aliens who look like demonic hedgehogs crash landing on Earth and trying to escape from intergalactic bounty hunters. This film was regularly on the TV when I was a kid, and I've seen it so many times. The sequels get progressively worse, but the original remains as one of the greatest movies of all time. Seriously!




5. AMERICAN PSYCHO (2000)


For me, this movie shows what a truly fantastic actor Christian Bale is, as his portrayal of the narcissistic yuppie psychopath Patrick Bateman is nothing short of perfect. I couldn't imagine anyone else in the role. This movie perfectly blends Horror with Black Comedy, and is full of classic and quotable lines. Utterly brilliant. "Try getting a reservation at Dorsea now, you fucking stupid bastard!!"



4. A NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET (1984)


I remember seeing this film on Channel 4 when I was a kid, and the scene early on with the girl being smeared up the wall and across the ceiling by an invisible assailant scared the living shit out of me. The sequels all have their moments, and I may be the only person on Earth who enjoyed the remake, but none of the other movies come close to the original. The birth of an icon and a truly great horror movie.



3. THE LOST BOYS (1987)


For the handful of people on the planet who haven't seen this, it's about two brothers who move to California. The older one gets mixed up with a local teenage gang who turn out to be vampires. I was in my early teens when I first watched The Lost Boys and something about it really appealed to me. I've seen it countless times, and like vampires, it never gets old (Jesus, did I really just write that?). Oh, and the soundtack is amazing too!



2. FRIDAY 13TH PART VI: JASON LIVES (1986)


I love the Friday 13th franchise. Bizarrely, I prefer the movies that the self proclaimed Friday 13th connoisseurs hate. My favourites are VI, X, VIII and V in that order. I also adore Freddy vs. Jason. I've chosen my favourite, Part VI for my list. I love how ridiculous it is. Jason is now an unstoppable undead supernatural being. He is still killing off an abundance of stereotypical American teenagers played by actors who haven't been teenagers for some time. It has a really enjoyable fast paced self aware storyline with lots of dark humour accompanying the horror. It exudes every 80's Horror cliché without remorse, and has some brilliant death scenes. It also has not one, but two Alice Cooper songs in the movie (massive points scored there!). Part VI is one of those movies that represents an era and a genre. It's grossly underrated and thoroughly entertaining.






1. THE RETURN OF THE LIVING DEAD (1985)


The greatest zombie movie of all time. It's dark, sick, twisted and great fun. It's also the movie that started the concept of zombies wanting to eat brains. There's a mountain of creativity in this film: the characters, dialogue, sets, costumes, everything. It's just the perfect movie. It even has my favourite soundtrack. I've seen it way more times than I can remember, and every time I see it, I get something new from it.


 

1 comment:

  1. I absolutely love that you made this list, Mr. Peach. Gives me a plan for the next week to see the few on this list that I have never seen. My list would include many of the ones you list here but I think Trick or Treat if even for just the soundtrack, Nomads (Pierce Brosnan) which I think was an awesome story and soundtrack, The Shining... need I say more, and Dance of the Damned (Cyril O'Reilly) because it portrays a sort of morality to the whole vampire thing would have been on my list. :D

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