Thursday, 18 February 2021

EP Review: FRIGHT NIGHT - The Maddest Stories Ever Told

 


01. The Killer Must Kill Again
02. Black Angel, White Angel (Danzig cover)
03. Eibon
04. Children Of The Night
05. Devil's Cry

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Tuesday, 16 February 2021

Album Review: TODD LA TORRE - Rejoice In The Suffering



01. Dogmata
02. Pretenders
03. Hellbound And Down
04. Darkened Majesty
05. Crossroads to Insanity
06. Critical Cynic
07. Rejoice In The Suffering
08. Vexed
09. Vanguards Of The Dawn Wall
10. Apology
11. Fractured (Bonus Track)
12. Set It Off (Bonus Track)
13. One By One (Bonus Track)

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Saturday, 13 February 2021

Movie Review: WILLY'S WONDERLAND (2021)

 




Well, this was fun! I've been excited for this movie since seeing the trailer a few weeks ago, and I'm pleased to say that I wasn't disappointed.

Spoilers ahead.

Willy's Wonderland starts with Nicolas Cage driving fast down a road off the beaten track. After running over some spikes, his wheel is popped, and he finds himself being rescued by a dude with a pick-up truck who takes him and his car to his garage. Unfortunately, the tow fee and the repair come to a thousand dollars. There is no internet and the cash machine is out of order, so there's no way he can pay. However, he is given the chance to "work off the debt" by spending the night as a janitor at the abandoned 'fun centre', Willy's Wonderland, to clean the place up ready for re-opening. What Nicolas Cage's character doesn't realise is that Willy's Wonderland was founded by a serial killer, and he, along with several of his serial killer mates, murdered a number of families there. To top off this ridiculous back-story, the serial killers, to avoid arrest, took part in a satanic suicide ritual and put their souls into the mechanical creatures at the centre. 

After several local murders are committed by a giant electronic weasel, law enforcement put two and two together, and come to a deal with it. If he stays in the park, they will feed him. So, basically, Nicolas Cage's accident is a set-up, and he's mean to to be a sacrifice. Unfortunately, they didn't realise that he's Nicolas Motherfucking Cage!

If you were after a film that isn't utterly ludicrous and not riddled with plot-holes, you've come to the wrong place. The film is a little slow at the beginning, and this isn't helped by the fact that Nicolas Cage's character doesn't utter a single word throughout the movie. We get a few grunts and nods, no back-story, but some cool fight scenes. Maybe they didn't have to pay him as much if there was no dialogue?

All of this silliness is entwined with the story of a young girl who, along with her friends, decide to burn Willy's Wonderland to the ground. They stop because they see Nicolas Cage in there, and at least a couple of the group think that it would be wrong to burn a stranger alive in the building. As they try to get him out, they fall through the roof and find themselves trapped in there too. Now we have annoying teenagers ready to be killed in hilarious ways by giant robot creatures that look like they're from Sesame Street! At this point, the movie steps its game up. 

After a night of murder and mayhem, Nicolas Cage and the one surviving girl leave the building in a moment that seems like a cheeky nod to 'From Dusk Til Dawn'. Despite fighting for his life several times, he had managed to clean up the place as agreed. 

I'd say Willy's Wonderland has a lot in common with the Banana Splits (read my review here), which, to be fair, is a much better movie. I think most of the budget on this one went on Nicolas Cage. The violence was to a rewarding level, but I think that a little more creativity and brutality in the death scenes would have elevated the film significantly. 

Having said that, Willy's Wonderland does have enough gore, humour, and memorable moments to be considered both a success and potentially a cult classic. 

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Monday, 1 February 2021

Movie Review: PSYCHO GOREMAN (2020)



Every now and then I discover a movie that ticks so many boxes that it's almost like it was made especially for me. Psycho Goreman is one of those. It's retro-Sci-Fi/Horror with a sharp sense of dark humour, with enough originality and quotable lines to make it a future cult classic.

Spoilers ahead!!

OK, so the movie starts with a pair of siblings, Mimi and Luke, playing 'Crazy ball', and as a forfeit for losing,  Luke has to dig a massive hole in the back garden so Mimi can bury him up to his neck. Whilst digging, they find a glowing gem and Mimi takes it. During the night, a monster digs his way from beneath where the gem was, and it turns out that this monster is a genocidal alien warlord from planet Gigax, who makes his way to a nearby shoe factory and kills some thieves who had been hiding out there. When the kids track the warlord down the following day, it transpires that the alien cannot kill them as Mimi possesses the gem stone, and he has to obey her every word. They name the alien Psycho Goreman and proceed to have fun abusing the powers of the gemstone and getting Psycho Goreman to get up to all kinds of things. Still following? In fairness, I haven't given much more away than the trailer does. If it sounds like your 'thing' so far, you won't be disappointed at all.

As with many of these low(ish) budget movies, one of the keys to success is having excellent actors, and they're all fantastic, bringing this dysfunctional family and other characters to life. It's well paced and the dialogue is snappy and often hilarious. It never drags and is great fun from start to finish. I love the aliens too. Psycho Goreman looks like an upgraded villain from a 90's episode of Power Rangers crossed with an Orc from Lord of the Rings. The 'Planetary Alliance' aliens are great too, looking like characters from Doctor Who on crack. It's worth mentioning that there's a decent amount of gore in the film too. 

Overall, I absolutely loved Psycho Goreman. It has all the ridiculousness of the 80's, humour, wit, and outlandish imagination that I could want. Absolutely superb!

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Sunday, 31 January 2021

Album Review: ACCEPT - Too Mean To Die

 


01. Zombie Apocalypse
02. Too Mean To Die
03. Overnight Sensation
04. No Ones Master
05. The Undertaker
06. Sucks To Be You
07. Symphony Of Pain
08. The Best Is Yet To Come
09. How Do We Sleep
10. Not My Problem
11. Samson And Delilah

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Friday, 22 January 2021

Album Review: NERVOSA - Perpetual Chaos

 


01. Venomous
02. Guided By Evil
03. People Of The Abyss
04. Perpetual Chaos
05. Until The Very End
06. Genocidal Command
07. Kings Of Domination
08. Time To Fight
09. Godless Prisoner
10. Blood Eagle
11. Rebel Soul
12. Pursued By Judgement
13. Under Ruins

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